OOH RAH!

Hey, guys. I'm leaving tonight for Boot Camp with the Marines. Some last encouragement for you.

Hey there, Army!
Gun toat'n Army
Get in your tanks and follow me
We are Marine Corps, can't you see?

Hey there, Air Force!
High flyin' Air Force
Get in your jets and follow me
We are Marine Corps, can't you see?

Hey there, Coast Guard!
Life savin' Coast Guard
Get in your boats and follow me
We are Marine Corps, can't you see?

Hey there, Navy!
World's Finest Navy
Get in your ships and follow me
We are Marine Corps, can't you see?

Me and Superman got in a fight
I hit him in the head with some Kryptonite
I hit him so hard I busted his brain
And now I'm dating Lois Lane

Well, me and Batman, we had one too
I hit him in the head with my left shoe
Right in the temple with my left heel
And now I'm driving the Batmobile

Mamma told Johnny not to go downtown,
Heard the Marine recruiter was hangin around.

Johnny went downtown anyways,
wanted to hear what recruiter had to say.

Recruiter asked Johnny what he wanted to be,
Johnny said, "I am wanna be infantry".

Johnny caught a plane to Vietnam,
there he fought the Viet-Cong.

Many he killed by knife and blade,
God only knows how many lives he saved.

Well Johnny was bold and Johnny was brave,
Johnny jumped on a hand grenade.

Saved the lives of the men he lead,
but before he died, this is what he said.

"Mamma O mamma please dont you cry,
The Marine Corps motto is Semper Fi!"

Now, this last one, I wrote myself and I sung it out with my squad during some PT.

Run me, run me, run me all over!
Run me, run me, til I hurt all over!
Break me, crush me, down into the clover!
I don't stop, til the running is done!

Run me, run me, run me all over!
Run me, run me, til I hurt all over!
Push me, lead me, gettin' me some PT!
I don't stop, until they're done, you see!!

6 Days

C130 going down the strip!
251 gonna take a little trip!
Stand up, buckle up, shuffle to the door!
Jump right out and count to four!

If my chute don't open wide!
I have another one by my side!
If my reserve don't blossom round!
I'll be the first one on the ground!





Up in the morning with the California sun!
Were gonna run all day till the running's done.
Gonna run, up the hill!
Down the hill, around the hill!
And back again!
Pain in my back
Pain in my legs
We don't care!
We like it there!
Pain in my chest!
Pain in my neck!
We don't care!
WE PUT IT THERE!





PT, PT, PT, COUNT
MILE ONE, JUST FOR FUN
MILE TWO, GOOD FOR YOU
MILE THREE, GOOD FOR ME
MILE FOUR, LET'S RUN SOME MORE
MILE FIVE, I FEEL ALIVE
MILE SIX, THAT'S THE TRICK
MILE SEVEN, I'M IN HEAVEN
MILE EIGHT, THIS FEELS GREAT
MILE NINE, I'M FEELING FINE
MILE TEN, LET'S RUN AGAIN





When I Die,
Bury me deep,
With Two M16s,
Beneath my Feet!
And by my side
My mule i wear
And don't forget,
My PT GEAR!

Cause early one morning,
At zero five,
The earth is gonna shake,
They'll be lightning from the sky!
Don't you be worry,
And don't you come undone,
Cause me and Chesty Puller,
Will be on our PT RUN!





You can keep your Army khaki,
You can keep your Navy blue.
I have the world's best fighting man,
To introduce to you.

His uniform is different,
The best you've ever seen.
The German's called him "Devil Dog,"
His real name is "Marine"

He was born on Parris Island,
The place where God forgot.
The sand is eighteen inches deep,
The sun is blazing hot.

He gets up every morning,
Before the rising sun.
He'll run a hundred miles and more,
Before the day is done.

He's deadly with a rifle,
A bayonet made of steel.
He took the warrior's calling card,
He's mastered how to kill.

And when he gets to heaven,
St. Peter he will tell,
Another Marine reporting, sir,
I've served my time in Hell.

So listen, all you young girls,
To what I have to say:
Go find yourself a young Marine,
To love you every day.

He'll hug you and he'll kiss you,
And treat you like a queen.
There is no better Fighting Man:
The United States Marine!

8 Days

Up from the sub sixty feet below!
I scuba to the surface and I'm ready to go!
Backstroke, sidestroke, swimming to the shore!
I hit the beach, and I'm ready for WAR!

A greased gun'n K-Bar by my side!
These are the tools that'a make men die!
HOOKIN AND'A JABBIN!
SLASHIN AND'A STABBIN!

YOUR CORPS!
MY CORPS!
OUR CORPS!
MARINE CORPS!!!

What's that running down your back!?
JUICE, JUICE, JUICE!

What's that sound of a devil dog!?
OOH, OOH, OOH!

PAIN!!!
IN MY BACK!
PAIN!!!
IN MY LEGS!
PAIN!!!
IN MY NECK!
I DON'T CARE!
I LIKE IT THERE!

We're the boys from Mission V, you've heard so much about!
Fathers lock their daughters up, whenever we come out!

Ooh RAH!!!

That Was One Epic Ride.

So, me and my buddy Brian just finished one of the most physically exhaustive experiences in my life. It started with a fifteen mile ride. When we got to the recruiting command, our recruiter took us on a three mile run around a local college campus. Then we rode back and every five miles, we stopped to do a few sets of twenty push-ups. Oh, man. It was epic. Then after that, we went swimming and destroyed this monstrous two mile hill at a forty-five degree angle. I'm exhausted.

A Loud Report

Sometimes, things go boom. It happens. In fact, almost everything goes boom. A demolitions expert can tell you that the explosive force of a half-kilogram of C4 or composition 4 can demolish a truck in short order. He can also tell you that a full gas tank is potentially more dangerous Did you know that your car engine averages 3.7 thousand explosions per minute? So every second, your car engine explodes about 61 times. Does that bother you? Perhaps not. You trust your auto-mechanics with your life. How about your computer technician? Lets examine the power running through your computer right now. Did you know that a taser employed by riot police carries 60 milliamps of electric current? That is not enough to kill you, no. But what about your USB port? Did you know that it has over a hundred milliamps? That is enough to fry your heart and keep your diaphragm from moving up and down, effectively paralyzing your lungs. Death.

But you're not afraid of your computer. You aren't afraid of your car, even though these things have a greater potential to harm you than a terrorists bomb or a taser aimed by someone trying to harm you. Do you ever wonder why?

Intent.

Both your computer and your car will behave under the same circumstances regardless of whether or not you use it or someone else. But not C4. Not a taser. What makes you afraid isn't the method of attack or even the destructive capability of the weapons being employed. You're afraid of the person wielding the weapon.

So here's my point. How can any rational person fear a roller-coaster while still riding a car, using a computer, or taking an  elevator?

A good friend of mine were at a theme part together and I offer a suggestion as to which ride we should take next. She declined. OK, I said. Let's try this one. Again I was met with a no. Wondering to myself, I asked if she would be OK with attempting the mildest of rides, the one that toddlers were complaining about being too slow. She declined.

Now my friend is not irrational. She drove herself, two others, and I to the theme park breaking a half-dozen traffic violations and nearly flip-rolling the car. She flies regularly and she even went with me to a firing range to prove how tough she was (entertaining).

She won't ride a quarter ride in front of a grocery store.

Who can blame me for being a little flabbergasted?

Glass

Oh, and something interesting happened at work the other day. I put in my two weeks notice (YAY!) but that's not the point. One of my regular customers who speaks only spanish came up to me and offered me some Marijauna. Now, that's the first time this has ever happened in my life. I don't smoke, I don't drink, and I certainly have never even -seen- an illegal substance (call me sheltered). But that day, I saw marijuana ground with coffee beans into a kind of chew. Strange. I just remembered it and felt like writing about it.

OH! And also, my new favorite insult, courtesy of the show Life On Mars. My friend Aaron called me up and called me an idiot because I couldn't hang out with him. I told him that he was one bit short of two bits.

It was amazing.

Singles Ward Dance

OK, so I go to a dance through my church (Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) and there's a dance in a different building every Saturday of the Month. These dances are called Stake Dances because a "Stake" is a geographic grouping of members of our church. The dances are anyone between the ages of 14 to 18. Now, I just learned that on Friday nights, there's another dance for people from 18-25. It was crazy. I loved it. Everyone was just so open and confident. I loved it. It was a little weird to be the youngest kid for once, but I had -so- much fun. So now I'm capable of going to dances on Friday and Saturday nights. I'm still recovering from the dance last night but the one tonight is going to be so much fun. I'm stoked.

Oh, and hey. On my mom's blog, she has this thing called Pay It Forward. What it means is that the first four people to comment on my blog can e-mail me and I will give each of them something. I think that what I'm going to do is have the first four people e-mail me their addresses and I'll either mail them some goodies like cookies or something. But you have to pay it forward. You have to post a similar message on your blog.

emac-d14@cox.net
Glass

I Have The Cleanest Hands Ever.

Seriously. I just spent six hours, from 6AM to 12PM, scrubbing. Scrubbing. And scrubbing.

Our store got reviewed by the Key Retailing department of the branch manager of Kroger grocery company. Stores average around the 90% range. Our store scored a 69%. My boss went berserk. She started yelling at everyone and throwing everyone under the bus to the regional manager. She had me move over 250 gallons of milk and juice and scrub 300 or so square feet of crusty freezing metal. With 120 degree water.

The absurd combination of almost freezing metal and super hot water and the steel wool scrubber that I had, totally and utterly destroyed my fingerprints. I checked. My finger prints are completely gone. So are all of the calluses that I had from cart pushing and pull-up bars.

Six hours.

After the fourth hour, I was up for a fifteen minute break. I dragged my disgusting bucket of water to the sink in the back of the store and my store director stopped me, shouting, "What are you doing!?" She then proceeded to tell me all of the things that I was doing wrong, not the least of which is "slacking at the easiest job in the store." She also said that I was a screw-off and that I did a terrible job and that she wanted to see me in two years to laugh at how much of a wreck I'll be in two years after I quit the Marine Corps.

I hate my job but my parents don't want me to quit, so I won't.